Don't Objectify Me
by AGreatAndTerribleBeing
Summary: written for the November Johnlockchallenges Gift Exchange. My prompt was "Just Because You're Drunk", with a bit of romance, fluff, and/or angst. So enjoy some drunk Sherlock.


"Sherlock. Stop."

John's irritated demand cut over the dull sound coming from the television.

"Whatever for?" Sherlock questioned, words coming out just a bit duller than usual. His eyes had a glassy tint to them, and there were several empty beer cans on the table in front of him.

John huffed in frustration. "Just because you're drunk does not mean I appreciate you fondling my thighs." And that was exactly what Sherlock was doing, kneading his long fingers into the muscle on John's legs, starting out at the knee and slowly moving upwards, getting increasingly closer to John's groin. Actually, he appreciated the action, a bit too much really, and Sherlock needed to stop before John's uncontrollable reaction became apparent. "Why are you drunk anyway?"

"Experiment," Sherlock stated bluntly, failing to elaborate.

John blinked owlishly for a moment before rolling his eyes. "Of course it was. You drank all my beer for an experiment? Tell me, what exactly is this 'experiment'?"

" 'S not done yet. I need to be hungover in the morning."

John turned his head to stare at the man next to him in disbelief. "Are you serious? Why the hell would you want to be hungover?"

Sherlock gave him a sigh, the one that signified that John was being oh-so dull once again. "To test new remedies, obviously."

"Oh, right," John replied, shaking his head. Of course Sherlock would be doing something stupid like that.

"That doesn't explain why you won't get your hands off me, though." Sherlock's slim fingers were massaging John's upper thigh by now, and no matter how hard he tried, John couldn't help himself from getting highly aroused. The detective was excellent with his fingers. The only thing saving him right now was the fact that Sherlock wasn't looking at his slowly-hardening groin, but if he just moved his fingers upwards a few more inches, well, there would be no hiding it. John tried to move away, but he was already pressed up against the arm of the sofa.

"Another experiment, of course." Sherlock's voice was nonchalant, as if caressing your flatmate's thighs was just as ordinary as reading the paper.

"What?" John was surprised, and getting exceedingly more irritated and aroused with each passing second.

Finally, Sherlock turned his head to John. "Surely you know this game, John. It's the one where the first person places his hand near the second person's knee, moving his way up until the second person becomes too uncomfortable to proceed. I wanted to see how long it would take before I made you uncomfortable." A feral grin appeared on Sherlock's face. "However, you don't seem to be uncomfortable at all, John. Well," a low chuckle emanated from his mouth. "Not in the way I'd thought you would be. It seems you rather enjoy this." He slid his fingers up higher, brushing against John's hard length.

John's breath hitched, and he stared wide-eyed at the detective. "Good deduction, yeah," he managed to murmur. Then he quickly jumped up, backing away from Sherlock. "No, hang on, I'm not an experiment, Sherlock, you can't treat me like one. You..." John searched for a word that could express how he was feeling. "You're objectifying me, and I really don't like that."

Sherlock looked vaguely hurt, and he was a bit shocked by John's reaction. Really he'd just wanted to make John feel good the only way he knew how, and that was through experimentation. "No, John, I-" how could he fix this? "I didn't mean to do that. I merely wanted to pleasure you. You've been a bit under the weather lately, and I thought maybe it might help." He looked at John a bit helplessly, hoping John would understand.

John went very still as he took in Sherlock's words. That was...sweet, actually, as far as Sherlock standards went. "So you're just trying to make me feel better," John said slowly. "Why would you want to do that?"

Sherlock suddenly felt very sober as he swallowed. "Because I don't like how I feel when you're upset. It's like I feel upset as well, which is a ridiculous notion, as feelings aren't contagious and they're not like an illness you can pass on."

John laughed, well and truly laughed. It was difficult to believe that this was happening, that Sherlock might possibly have the same attraction towards John that John had towards the detective. "You're completely mad," he said, walking back towards the couch. He straddled Sherlock gently, knees on either side of his waist. He didn't give Sherlock a chance to speak before he leaned down and captured his lips in a gentle kiss. After a few moments, he pulled back, staring down at Sherlock, and Sherlock was glad to see more spark in his eyes than had been there for weeks.

"All you had to do was tell me that, Sherlock." John cupped Sherlock's face in his hands.

"Whatever you say, John," Sherlock replied, and John could practically hear the eye roll in his voice. He gently slid his hands up John's thighs once more, and this time John let out a small gasp of appreciation. "Now may I show you exactly how I can make you feel better?"

John grinned, grinding himself against Sherlock. "Oh god, yes."


End file.
